You Don't Have a Manifestation Problem. You Have a Receiving Problem.

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Earning Your Joy

How comfortable are you with allowing yourself to enjoy life’s pleasures without having to “earn it?”Being able to treat yourself to a little something for no reason, book that trip just because, or lounge around for a spa day in the middle of the week?

I’ll be honest, I could be better at this. But I’ve gotten much better at learning how to enjoy these pleasures in life without having to “work hard first.” Society teaches us (especially American culture) that we have to EARN abundance. That abundance doesn’t “come easy.” You need to “work hard” to have nice things. Scarcity programming at its finest. Look at this picture I found of you working...

The Root of the Program

I didn’t grow up with a lot, but we also didn’t grow up poor. Middle-class family in that awkward middle where we didn’t qualify for assistance programs because my parents made just over the limit…but were also living paycheck to paycheck. I learned quickly that money was something evasive, something there was never enough of, and something people fought about a lot.

My story isn’t unique; I’m sure some of you are nodding your head right now, saying “me too.” It’s a very common experience, unfortunately, and this is where our scarcity programming is rooted. When I started my spiritual journey, my scarcity wound was one of the deepest programs in my life. I had so much resistance around believing what so many of my teachers would tell me:

“Abundance doesn't need to be earned; it's already here, waiting to be received by you.“

I remember sarcastically thinking, “Well, I’m ready to receive motherf*ckers. My bank account has $20 in it!” lol…Clearly I was not on my mindful communication game yet.

But truly, my inner voice believed manifesting abundance with your thoughts was a bunch of “woo woo” hippy dippy bullsh*t because it wasn’t working for me. But I was only working half the equation. You can’t just THINK your way into receiving abundance. You have to FEEL your way into it, and that’s the part most people struggle with.

The Stranger Who Read My Soul 

In 2020, the pandemic forced me to pivot a lot of my business online. I was busting my butt learning, growing, creating, and I was enjoying it. But I felt like the wins were small compared to “everyone else” who was doing it. I had friends in my orbit who were landing big collaborations, gaining tens of thousands of followers on social media, making 6 figures in just months. And there I was with my 2,000 followers, my $ 0-dollar months, and wondering what I was doing “wrong.”

Then my wife booked me a Reiki session with this woman I had never met. It had been a while since I had Reiki done, so I was looking forward to it. But what I was not prepared for was to be READ and CALLED OUT on such a deep level.

After the 1-hour session, we sat in the lounge and drank tea while she shared what came up during the session.

“You know a lot of people come in here wanting to teach and speak on stages. I meet a lot of people with big dreams…but you…you are meant to speak on stages…to the masses.”

My ears perked up a little bit. My ego was a little excited because it’s what I’ve always felt inside: that I was meant to share a message with the world (even though I wasn’t sure what it was yet). And then she quickly said something to stab my ego right in the chest…

“The problem is you’re so guarded. You’ve been through so many painful experiences, and it makes sense as to why you have these guards in place. But you’ve forgotten how to receive. I can see that you’ve been working really, really hard. Lots of doing, masculine energy. But you don’t receive enough, which is the other half of the equation. Without both, you are incomplete, and the Universe can't bring what you're manifesting."

I wasn’t sure if I should feel seen or attacked, haha. This stranger was literally reading the depths of my soul!  My ego said, Who gave her permission to go in there? And my higher self quickly snapped back, “Uh, you did, dummy, when you booked the appointment.” Haha

I remember feeling my chest tighten a bit, knowing a stranger was touching something very deep. But then reminded myself to breathe, that I was safe, and that I asked for this. I came here to connect, to get aligned, and RECEIVE any guidance the Universe had to offer me.

She continued, “If you don’t allow yourself to receive, the Universe can’t bring you the abundance that’s already yours. The opportunities, the wealth, the wisdom. You need to expand your container. Start with small things. Like going to the beach to just watch the sunset. Treating yourself to a coffee at your favorite cafe. Booking a massage just because."

It hit me hard because she was right. I only “enjoy” things after I work for them. I wouldn’t go to the beach to watch the sunset because it wasn’t “practical” to drive all the way down there. I’d be “wasting” so much of my evening driving. I wouldn’t allow myself to spend on a coffee because “I could just make one at home.”

But I was missing the point: that not everything I do needs to have a productivity goal. Not everything I do has to be “efficient.” Not everything I do needs a “practical purpose” outside of experiencing joy and pleasure. 

Abundance Isn't What You Think

And that has been the biggest unlock for the abundance I experience now. It’s been by far the most transformative part of my healing. To rewire the belief that “abundance has to be earned.” And I want that for you because abundance doesn’t just mean MONEY. Abundance is so much more than that. You can have an:

• Abundance of health
• Abundance of authentic friends
• Abundance of opportunity
• Abundance of laughter
• Abundance of connection
• Abundance of ideas
• Abundance of love

Abundance simply means there is MORE THAN ENOUGH of something. The Universe isn’t going to run out. There’s enough for you, for me, for your dog, your kid, your grandma, your neighbor, EVERYONE.

How often do you let yourself do something just because it brings you joy?  Just because it heightens the pleasure of the experience?

Not enough, I’d guess.

Astrologically speaking, there’s some cool stuff going on with Venus and Jupiter. Venus rules how we draw things in: love, beauty, money, pleasure. Jupiter is the planet of expansion and abundance, making everything it touches bigger. When they meet, our ability to attract and our capacity to receive are perfectly aligned. What I’m trying to say is, the energy is in your favor. Work with it, use it to start shifting your beliefs around what abundance means.

How You Can Integrate This

More specifically, I want you to think about ways you can activate FEELINGS of abundance. Maybe you:

• Invite that one friend who makes you laugh on a coffee date = abundance of laughter and connection
• Go on a hike and immerse yourself in nature = abundance of beauty.
• Visit that museum exhibit = abundance of awe and inspiration.

Whatever you do, remember that you don’t need to make it “efficient,” just joyful, just because.

These are the tiny actions that signal to your subconscious that you are creating new rules, new beliefs, adopting a new way of being, a new normal. When I have my coaching clients do these things, they often underestimate the power of the joy they’ll experience. The most common response is, “Wow. I am so glad I did that. It showed me that I need to do that more often.”

And that joy lingers throughout their week…changing the thoughts they have, the emotions they experience, and the decisions they make.

Even though the message in that Reiki session was very clear, I still catch myself sometimes choosing efficiency over joy, productivity over pleasure. But now I notice it when it happens, and I have the power to choose differently.

The take-home message: Your abundance will be influenced by the capacity in which you are able to receive.

So this week, I want you to do one thing that has absolutely no productive purpose. No ROI. Just something that makes you feel good to be alive.

Watch what happens when you let yourself receive 🥳